How far should one go in the name of kindness and social etiquette?
This dilemma was at the heart of a recent post on Reddit’s “Am I The A******?” (AITA) forum, where user u/UsualSuccess7450 questioned whether he was wrong for declining to switch his premium economy seat on a flight for a standard economy seat so that a newlywed couple could sit together. His refusal sparked a confrontation with the husband seeking the seat swap for his wife.
Since the post on July 11, it has garnered over 22,000 upvotes and close to 2,000 comments.
“I was on a flight from Melbourne to Dubai, seated in a premium economy seat for the comfort on the fourteen-hour flight,” explained u/UsualSuccess7450. “The person next to me had been upgraded and requested me to switch seats with his wife, as they had just gotten married and were honeymooning.”
Initially considering the swap, u/UsualSuccess7450 extended his congratulations and inquired about the wife’s seat, only to discover she was in economy. This led him to decline the request.
The husband proposed to cover the price difference between the seats, but u/UsualSuccess7450 declined, citing the good deal he had secured for his seat.
When the husband mentioned their honeymoon budget, u/UsualSuccess7450 chose to end the discussion by wearing headphones, resulting in the husband insultingly labeling him, and u/UsualSuccess7450 retorting back.
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Preparation is Key
While a seat swap would have been a kind gesture, etiquette expert Grotts noted that u/UsualSuccess7450’s offer to accept payment for the seat was already generous.
“The passenger in business class displayed ‘class’ by offering the seat at cost, a kind gesture that was unfortunately declined without appreciation,” she commented.
Many Reddit users supported this stance, affirming that u/UsualSuccess7450 was justified in rejecting funding an upgrade for the husband’s wife.
Commenters pointed out that some passengers always aim for better seats without considering the inconvenience to others, suggesting premeditation in such requests.
“Trying to guilt-trip with the honeymoon card—what was the expectation there?” one user questioned. “Why did they feel entitled to a spontaneous $1K gift from a stranger?”
Grotts advised the couple that better planning would have prevented this situation, emphasizing the importance of preparing in advance for a smoother travel experience.
“‘Be prepared before you leave home,'” she recommended. “Preplanning instead of relying on others’ generosity would have been a wise move, ensuring a more comfortable start to their honeymoon.”
For couples embarking on their honeymoon, she suggested early booking, utilizing miles for upgrades, or investing in first-class tickets as a wedding gift to enhance their journey.